I’ve realised that slowly i’m transitioning from a physical diary to electronic journalling. Whether or not this is down to me losing the key to my diary i don’t know.

I don’t know how i’m feeling today. It’s been a long day and sometimes things just don’t go the way you want them. I’ve just gotten out of two back to back 2 hour classes with minimal breaks, and i’m in that weird state of being mentally drained and sad, where you just want to curl into a ball on your bed and do nothing but stare at a wall.

I think a bit of it may be boyfriend frustrations. We’re going to see a show later and seeing as i just got out of class, i really didn’t want to have to go all the way home and then come back into town. So i told him that earlier, and asked if he wanted to get some dinner with me before the show.

However because he’s hungover and hasn’t gotten dressed so far today, he would rather ignore that and inconvenience me to go all the way to his (which, may i add, is even further away that my house is) before coming back into town. It’s little things like that that annoy me about him sometimes. I really did want to go to dinner with him

And the way if he’s on his phone and i’m trying to talk to him, he will sometimes just flat out ignore me. And there’s no way i believe that he’s just that tuned out that he actually can’t hear me. He can hear me. He just chooses to ignore me. And the way he’ll often pull out his phone while we’re eating in a restaurant. That pisses me off.

Jesus, and the way he doesn’t own like ANY bathroom products! LITERALLY ALL HE OWNS IS A TOOTHBRUSH, TOOTHPASTE AND SHAVING CREAM! He ran out of shower gel a couple of weeks ago so he was just using the antibacterial hand soap that was in the bathroom. I reckon he’d still be using it if i hadn’t bought him some new body wash. Plus his bathroom is always horribly dirty. It frustrates me that he looks after himself so poorly and doesn’t make any sort of effort towards his appearance. Especially when i try so goddamn hard on mine.

I didn’t intend for this to be a boyfriend rant, and i’m glad that no one reads this blog because i certainly wouldn’t want anyone to hear me bitching about him. In all honesty i’m probably going to have a similar rant when i find my diary key. It’s difficult though, because while i would normally talk to my friends about this sort of annoyances, i’m reluctant to with this topic because i want them to like him, and when people only hear the negatives about a relationship, they start to dislike him. And i really want my friends to like him.

I know i should probably talk to him about these things that are bothering me, but i don’t want him to think that i’m trying to control his life too much.